do you like my writing? (please no profanity only positive feed back)?
this is only the first chapter and it needs 2 be longer i know but i need some constructive criticism
Chapter 1: Journal #1 By: Elok R.
Syimetry’s journal March 4th 2010.The streets reek of injustice and crime. Ever since the nuclear bombing in California nothing has been the same. The economy has plummeted so severely that it shows no chance of return. Money has no value and people barter for their needs. This makes us the most susceptible country to war. And chance of another nuclear attack is nigh a chance.though this is known by the people instead of unifying they have segregated themselves into rival factions, committing unspeakable acts of crime to survive.
Some like me and others fight to keep a system of justice in our country and eventually we will go back and change what happened. But the last time we went back we lost… again. I feel that it was because we were not prepared and our cockiness was our downfall but our faults had broughtened humanity closer to extinction. But the next time… the next time we will succeed so that this future never happens, nobody will fear us, and in turn no nuclear disaster.
We used to be revered. People, children would look to us for hope, symbols of justice, and reasons for a bright future. We were the countries best kept secret. But April 8th 2008 we were introduced internationally. At first they tried to duplicate our “powers” through their science experiments and genetic manipulation they realized that there was no possibility of power replication and they feared that our country had a weapon that their country could never obtain. So in the dead of the night while we slept they detonated a massive nuclear war head on our soil. The blast alone detached parts of the north American continent but the nuclear gases cloud the blast zone and are slowly but surely moving across the world which will kill off humanity as we know it.
Us now we are no longer a beacon of hope for people. We are the enemies of society even though we are its only protectors, we fall victim to the threats and cynicism of the public though it is us who help to subdue the real threats against the public. They fought so had to free themselves from our so called vigilantism when they welcomed us before. They attest to powers that they had once relied on to help them. And though we are hated now we will go back and reverse theses atrocity’s because without our existence these people will not suffer as much as they have.
Some of us have lost stock in humanity a good friend of mine named Chris Radke once said “one day the senators and bastards who had once hated us will call out “save us!” and I’ll look down at the scum who have no power and ill whisper NO.
Though Chris has lost his faith he knows that by helping those of us who want to save them he will redeem his self in humanity’s eyes.
No, I don’t like your writing. Anybody who seeks positive feedback only REALLY can’t write worth a damn.
Can someone read my persuasive essay and tell me what you think? Please?
The surge of child births that occurred in the decades following World War II, which came to be known as the ‘Baby Boomer’ generation, begin to collect retirement in 2008, with the oldest of the generation reaching 62. With a growing number of this generation retiring and subsequently collecting Social Security benefits in the coming decade, the United States government has repeatedly attempted to address the growing disparity between the money being contributed to Social Security and the amount of money that will be paid out in coming years. Unfortunately, despite their repeated attempts at a bipartisan agreement, no solution has been agreed on. These facts, along with a rapidly escalating cost of living, should make it apparent to all working Americans that Social Security can no longer be relied on as a sole source of income for retirement.
The Social Security Act was signed into law as part of the ‘New Deal,’ a series of economic and social reforms between 1934 and 1936. It was created to protect the American people from befalling the hardships of 20th century life, and was the first instance of an American President advocating for federal assistance of senior citizens. Fifteen years after the Social Security Act was signed into law in 1935, the ratio of workers paying into Social Security to beneficiary was 16:1. A decade later, in 1960, that number was reduced by more than a third, with only 5 payees per beneficiary. In 2010, that number had reduced itself even further, with each Social Security beneficiary being augmented by only three workers paying into the Social Security system. At the 2010 rate, the program is slowly bankrupting itself, paying out more than it is receiving. As the years progress, the number of retirees and other beneficiaries is only expected to increase, along with the prospect of a Social Security deficit that cannot be rectified without drastic changes to a system that has been in place for what is approaching a century. Even in the face of these facts, our politicians seem dead-set on holding onto partisan views, negating any real progress towards a solution to the problem that Social Security has the potential of becoming.
There are many privatized options in place for funding retirement, such as an IRA, 401K, stock options, and employee pension plans. While none of these options have the feeling of security that was once associated with the Social Security program, the economy of the present and foreseeable future almost requires us to maintain a diversified financial portfolio, due to the rising cost of living. While it may seem like a smart decision to put your future retirement funds into a single investment and maintain the idea that your money will recover, economic scandals in recent years have shaken the very idea of a ‘safe’ investment. Accordingly, a large number of people in recent years have diversified their investments, to avoid a substantial loss in the event of a company that is invested into experiences a loss, such as bankruptcy.
Starting in 1975, Social Security benefits were adjusted based of changes in the Consumer Price Index (CPI). This is referred to as a Cost of Living Adjustment (COLA), and has only differed from the CPI by 2 percentage points in a single year since its introduction. Nevertheless, in 2009 and 2010, there has been no COLA for Social Security, despite fluctuations in the CPI. This has caused understandable unease among a growing population that looks at Social Security not only as a relied upon source of income after retirement, but as an investment and American right.
There have been many changes to Social Security proposed by the government, including privatization, increasing the accepted retirement age in which one can receive benefits, adjusting the way that the CPI is measured, and advocating for private retirement savings. These proposed changes to the structure and implementation of Social Security will more heavily affect those in a higher income bracket, but individuals from every income class will be forced to change the way that they view the financial aspect of their retirement. There has also been sporadic suggestions of cutting the Social Security program entirely, and although these suggestions have not taken root in mainstream culture, the suggestion has raised public fears regarding the possibility, especially in the face of a rapidly growing federal deficit. The American working class has been forced to re-assess their investments, future prospects, and financial plans as a precautionary measure against the chance of the privatization or outright dissolution of Social Security.
The first sentence is too long, which makes it confusing. I had to read it twice.
In the second paragraph, befalling and payees were used incorrectly. Substitute suffering and payors.
Intelligent piece, congratulations.
How can I get a job if I don’t have experience?
So, I’ve worked with people before, I guess, in serving crab feeds, luncheons, etc. (but I don’t like working with fast food. The smells make me dizzy; maybe an ingredient? Anyway…). I have not had a job though.
I am 16 years old in California, and I would really like to attain a job. I need to make an income so that I can save for future purchases, like home, car, family, college, and further debts that will inevitably come my way (I’m a little bit of a tightwad with money; I’ve had at least $300 in savings since I was about 10).
I have been in sea scouts for two years, in which I have volunteered, learned leadership skills, maintained a wood- hulled 53- ft. boat, and earned four awards. So a job at a nautical store like WEST MARINE would be fantastic!
I have some background babysitting my cousin for the past three or four years (he’s five), and have been able to entertain him for hours at a time. So, working (sort of) with kids, at a place like TOYS R’ US, CHUCK E. CHEESE, or another toy store or kids place, would also be right up my alley (I AM a big kid; I still have lots of toys, so for the most part, I know them; I can help buyers decide and sell to them these kinds of toys, partly because personally I really do want every single one of them)!
I like food, I’ve been a server at 12 luncheons and crab feeds all totaled, and have personally earned my ship or school over 200 dollars in tips for my service and attitude (I did theater; I can act like I care!). But as I said, the smells of fast food restaurants make me dizzy, so I wouldn’t be able to be in them for longer than say, an hour or so at a time. Maybe a job as a maitre… screw it, I cannot spell that word. The person who stands in front and says “right over here, we have an open table for you” (do they hire at 16? hmmm…)
I swim a lot, and am trying to attain lifeguard certification this coming spring, so perhaps a lifeguard job or a swimming supply store such as Leslie’s would suit me, as I’ve had to maintain pools a lot and know what most of the stuff on the shelves is.
I have always had at least two cats in the house (at least, since I was two or three), as well as dogs to take care of and house- sit for when neighbors/ family members are away, so I am fairly knowledgeable in most pet supplies, and would be able to sell them (but I think petsmart has changed their policies, because they used to hire at 16, and last time I applied, they told me I was too young for the position of stock associate. :/
I guess I have experience with a few things, and have tried to compile a resume (even in different formats to appeal more), but I have applied to 20+ places, and had to face the bitter sound of rejection from all of them. Personally, I thought I had a lot going for just being 16. Or maybe that’s the problem and no one wants to hire 16- year- old’s? I think the last time I applied for a job was at Toys R’ Us near my home, and finally had a resume I felt good about. Unfortunately, they refused to hire me because they had an autofill sort of thing on their website that took “Sea Scouts” as a job, and “Jan 2010– present” as “still working under this employer” and refused to hire because I already supposedly had a job (yeah, there was a box I didn’t uncheck that I should’ve), and now I have to wait 6 months to apply again, even under a different account (because they still have my social and address)…
My question is: how does one get a job if they have never been employed? I really do need money; my family has been broke since early 2000’s, especially since my dad never paid child support (seriously, maybe once). What magic words need to go onto that resume to make it pop out to potential employers? Because even some of my C- average students with nothing going on outside of school are able to snatch up jobs at ice cream parlors and pizza shops, while I work my ass of compiling resumes and applying to 20 different places I can’t reapply to in 6 months. What does it take? What am I not doing or doing wrong?
Thanks for the help.
You’ve limited yourself by eliminating food service as a possibility, since a lot of first jobs come in that sector. Even in your own question you say people are snatching up jobs at ice cream parlors and pizza shops-food service jobs, even if it’s not technically fast food. If you don’t want to work at a burger place or that kind of thing, look into casual dining restaurants. You could work as a hostess or a server, or counter help depending on what kind of place. There are sandwich shops that are quick service but not the fast food of McDonald’s.
There are no magic words to make your application stand out. There are a lot of people looking for jobs, and a lot of the kinds of jobs that would be right for you are not the kind that are advertised. When you fill out an application and take it in to drop off, don’t just hand it to anyone. Ask for the hiring manager, or if they aren’t available, any manager. Smile, introduce yourself, tell that you are very interested in working there and feel you’d be a great addition to their team. Then hand them your completed application and say you look forward to hearing from them soon. A few days later, if you haven’t heard from them, call and follow up. You want to get yourself noticed without making a pest out of yourself.
More Conservative Republican lies?
An acquaintance forwarded me the following email:
ON JANUARY 1, 2013, THE US GOVERNMENT IS REQUIRING EVERYONE TO HAVE DIRECT
DEPOSIT FOR SS CHECKS.
WONDER WHY? HR 4646 Be sure to read entire explanation: Watch for this
AFTER November elections; remember this BEFORE you VOTE, in case you think
Obama is looking out for the elderly and your best interest.
A 1% tax on ALL bank transactions is what HR 4646 calls for. Do you
receive a paycheck, or a retirement check from Social Security or a pension
fund and have it direct deposit?? Well guess what … It looks as if Obama
wants to tax it 1%!! This bill was put forth by Rep. Chaka Fattah (D-PA).
YES, that is 1% tax on all bank transactions – HR 4646, every time it goes
in and every time money goes out.
Ask your congressperson to vote NO. FORWARD THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW! 1%
tax on all bank transactions ~ HR 4646 – ANOTHER NEW OBAMA TAX SLIPPED IN
WHILE WE WERE ASLEEP. Checked this on Snopes, it’s true! Check it out
yourself ~ HR 4646.
President Obama’s finance team is recommending a one percent (1%)
transaction fee (TAX). Obama’s plan is to sneak it in after the November
elections to keep it under the radar. This is a 1% tax on all transactions
at any financial institution – banks, credit unions, savings and loans, etc.
Any deposit you make, or even a transfer within your own bank from one
account to another, will have a 1% tax charged. If your paycheck or your
Social Security or whatever is direct deposit, it will get a 1% tax charged
for the transaction. If your paycheck is $1000, then you will pay Obama $10
just for the privilege of depositing your paycheck in your bank. Even if you
hand carry your paycheck or any check in to your bank for a deposit, 1% tax
will be charged.
You receive a $5,000 stock dividend from your broker, Obama takes $50 just
to allow you to deposit that check in the bank. If you take $1,000 cash to
deposit at your bank,1% tax will be charged. Mind you, this is from the man
who promised that, if you make under $250,000 per year, you will not see one
penny of new tax. Keep your eyes and ears open, you will be amazed at what
you learn about this guy’s under-the-table moves to increase the number of
ways you are taxed.
Oh, and by the way, if you receive a refund from the IRS next year and you
have it direct deposited or you walk in to deposit that check, you guessed
it. You will pay a 1% charge of that money just for putting it in your bank.
Remember, any money, cash, check or whatever, no matter where it came from,
you will pay a 1% fee if you put it in the bank. >
>Some will say, oh well, it’s just 1%. Are you kidding me? It’s a 1%
tax increase across the board. Remember, once the tax is there, they can
also raise it at will. And if anyone protests, they will just say, “Oh,
that’s not really a tax, it’s a user fee”!
Think this is no big deal? Go back and look at the transactions you made
from last year’s banking statements. Then add the total of all those
transactions and deduct 1%. Still think it’s no big deal?
Now if you were to look up HR 4646, you would find that is entitled the “Debt Free America Act” and that is was meant to replace the income tax on individuals, not to add another tax. Furthermore in was referred to a committee on Feb. 23, 2010 and no other action was taken on it.
Because this bill was introduced in a previous session of Congress, no more action can occur on it.
So why is the author of the email trying to scare people into believing that Obama is trying to sneak in another tax?
What exactly do you expect from Republicans on the run…
May you please review my resume?
Im a 19 year old trying to get a job at my school doing clerical work. It helps to bring in your resume and a recommendation letter but im not sure if i can get the letter soon enough so I want to make my resume great.
Golden Valley Protection Services Present
•Guard various high schools during non school hours
•Observe for any safety hazards, unauthorized visitors, damages, suspicious activities, etc.
•Complete detailed narrative reports and maintain daily activity reports (DARs)
Bakersfield College Bookstore Aug. 2010
•Worked on cash register with transactions that included cash, credit cards, e-checks, and student loan checks.
•Worked on floor organizing and stocking books
•Balanced cash drawer and completed inventory forms at end of shifts.
•Responsible for maintaining a clean and orderly area.
Sno Shack of Bakersfield May. 2008 – Aug. 2010 (seasonal)
•Trained new employees
•Completed inventory forms
•Balanced cash drawer
•Responsible for opening and closing up shack.
•Provided excellent customer service by greeting customer.
•Performed many cleaning duties, handled cash, served and made snow cones independently.
Steppin out of Shoes Aug. 2007- 2008
•Provided great costumer service by assisting customers with shoe selection and greeted customers who walked in.
•Operated the register.
•Unloaded merchandise and stocked shelves.
Childcare/Housekeeping Sept. 2006 – Present
•Watched children for several families.
•Demonstrated excellent housekeeping for family and friends.
Teacher’s Aide/Tutor 2006 – 2009
•Helped improve 3rd – 4th grade student’s math and reading skills.
•Tested students to see improvement in math and did fun learning activities to raise test scores.
•Ran errands; filed and organized papers.
•Graded papers and put grades into computer.
•Also helped with mentally ill children
Camp Counselor 2007- 2009
•Supervised children and made their trip a fun and enjoyable experience.
•Taught kids about teamwork and responsibility.
Duplicating Office Aide Sept 2006 – May 2008
•Stapled, collated, and copied papers.
•Ran errands for teachers and mailed out important school announcements.
•Created school flyers and programs for school events.
Dental Assistant Program
•Pepper Spray certified
•Excellent communication and interpersonal skills.
•Microsoft Office, Power Point, Excel, general computer task and internet.
•Strong money handling abilities.
Provided upon request
Please leave any comments or suggestions thank you:)
will u review my damn resume…is that better. that comment didnt help me one bit…I still need my resume reviewed
When asking someone politely to do something for you you say “Could you…” not “May you…”. “May I…” is used when you are asking someone else if you’re allowed to do something and basically means “Do I have permission to…”. So by you starting the question with “May you… ” you are asking if we have permission to review your résumé, which doesn’t exactly make sense.
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